I wake up every morning thinking about the fathom of dreams that have plagued me throughout the night, assessing them and trying to understand what brought them about. Sometimes trying desperately to forget them, especially the scary ones. At times I remember to write them down, but mostly I just think and then forget them. The dreams are all so scattered and make no sense most of the time. Perhaps I should write them down and make short stories of them...? Definite idea there. Another task that I will push to the back burner. Who knows how long I will actually use this blog? I will attempt to keep it going, but my mind wanders and needs several stimulants to keep it's attention. That is why I have so many hobbies. I stick with one for a while, then lose interest and start another. My mother had that habit. Flowing from one thing to another ....
I always want to learn more and more. You cannot learn everything that is offered in this world. No human would ever have the time in their one life to know everything there is to know. It seems that my brain is not fillable, but why can't I remember anything? Perhaps I don't retain enough and it keeps emptying out and that is why I feel the need to fill it back up again? Sounds like pure craziness to me ...? Hmmmm
The mind ... thoughtsneverstoppingalwaysrunningwhereistheshutoffvalve?!?
What do I need to get done today ? What would I like to do ? Where is that thing I was looking for ? Gee, that looks dirty. I should clean. I like the way that material looks. What project should I work on today ? When can I finish those books I was reading ? This tea tastes great. Gotta check emails. Would like to go for a walk. It's nice and quiet. Got some bills to pay. What should I make for dinner ? Is that a bug on the wall ? The plants need watering. The birds are so playful. That shower felt great. Would like to exercise today. My skin is dry. I miss my mommy. I love my house. Will I ever find a job ? and so forth and so on and yateta yateta
What about the thoughts that just find themselves in my brain? Who put them there? I have not idea where a lot of them come from. Too many movies, or books?
Someone I met years ago put an idea in my head regarding all of these thoughts that consume me. This person is intuitive with the non-living (ghosts) and can sense and see things that others cannot. I'm not sure what I believe, but I find it very interesting. She told me at that time, that I have several ... entities/ 'spirits' - whatever you want to call them - around me. When I lived in an apartment that I shared with my cousin, there was lots of commotion going on all of the time - movement, talking, shuffling, etc. After I moved out, she said it was so quiet and empty. It makes me wonder ... do I have spirits following me around ? I have sensed things before....
but that is another topic for another day !
